How to Improve Your Writing by Standing on Your Head
by: phil.yaffe@yahoo.com
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by Philip Yaffe
You may not have thought about it,
but newspapers provide the best examples of clear, concise, dense (factual)
writing you can find anywhere. Otherwise people wouldn’t read them.
Journalists not only write superbly
well, they do so extremely rapidly. When a news event occurs, they don’t have
the luxury of spending several days to put together their text. At best, they
have a few hours.
Learning
how journalists work their “daily miracles” can help you write better at your
much more leisurely pace.
Here is an article from an international newspaper.
yesterday has once again called for the United Nations to mount a peacekeeping
operation in the violence-torn
international efforts to help
At the same time, Her Majesty’s Government is joining with other
European Union countries to threaten sanctions against Sudan unless its
government energetically moves to end the “ethnic cleansing” against black
villagers in Darfur by the mainly Arab Janjawid militias. UN officials report
that the conflict has already claimed from 30,000 – 50,000 lives and about 1.2
million people have been displaced, with about 200,000 taking refuge in
neighbouring
(And the story continues)
In the first paragraph, we learn that:
1.
The British
Government is concerned about the situation in
2.
3.
4.
It is pressing
the United Nations to supply this peacekeeping force.
5.
This is not the
first time that it has urged the UN to supply peacekeeping force.
6.
The population
of
7.
Aid agencies in
people is inadequate.
In the second paragraph, we learn that:
1.
The trouble in
2.
Arab militias
are attacking black villagers.
3.
enough to stop the war.
4.
They threaten
sanctions against
5.
To date,
between 30,000 - 50,000 people have been killed.
6.
About 1.2
million have been displaced.
7.
About 200,000
have fled across the border into the neighbouring country of
8.
These figures
come from the United Nations, which is a reliable source.
Imagine
that you had known absolutely nothing about
virtually everything you need to know about this tragic situation.
This is
certainly clear, concise, dense writing at its very finest. Unfortunately, it
is seldom recognised as such. According to the adage: Today a newspaper may be the most valuable thing in the world; tomorrow
it is good only for wrapping fish.
Now that
you appreciate how remarkable qualities of newspaper writing, the question is:
How does it happen? And how can you apply its lessons to your type of writing?
Turning Things on Their Head
Journalist use an ingenious
technique called the “inverted pyramid”. Before seeing how it works, it would
be useful to see where it came from.
A couple of centuries ago, poor
literacy and primitive printing techniques meant that newspapers had few
readers, few pages, and were published infrequently (once a week or even once a
month). As literacy and printing techniques improved, the number of readers
increased, the number of pages increased. And so did frequency. Most newspapers
were published at least once a week, some 2 - 3 times a week. Many even became
dailies.
This accelerating pace of production
created a serious technical problem. In more leisurely days, if a story was too
long for the space assigned to it, there was always plenty of time to either
rewrite it or redesign the page. However, when newspapers became dailies, this
was no longer possible.
What newspapers needed were stories
that they could cut off from the bottom. In this way, instead of labouring to
revise a story at the last minute, they could simply remove the last few
sentences or paragraphs, and the job was done.
In order to do this, stories had to
be written in a very special way. It is of no value simply to cut from the
bottom if the lost information is crucial for the reader to understand what the
story is all about. Consequently, stories had to be written “top down”. All key
information had to be concentrated at the beginning and all secondary
information presented in declining order of importance. In this way text could
be deleted from the bottom and no one would know that it had ever been there.
This story structure became known as
the inverted pyramid. It worked extremely well because it not only solved the mechanical
problem of overly long texts, it also turned out to be how people prefer to get
their information, particularly when they are in a hurry.
With today’s computer technology,
the mechanical problem that gave rise to the inverted pyramid is no longer
relevant. However, because it constitutes the very basis of good expository
writing, the inverted pyramid is still held in high esteem.
Imagine an upside-down pyramid, or
rather a triangle, i.e. with its point at the bottom and the wide part at the
top.
The top, where all the key
information is concentrated, is called the “lead”. The second part, which
contains the secondary information (details), is called the “body.
·
How to construct the lead
The beginning of the story
(“lead”) must be concise. This may be a single sentence or several sentences,
whatever is necessary to give the reader a clear overview of what it contains.
Journalists often say that they
spend about 50% of their time writing the lead of a story; writing the rest of
the story also takes about 50%. Why? Because this is usually how long it
requires them to determine the key information to put into the lead, and then
to package it in a clear, concise manner. After that, the rest of the story
almost writes itself.
Determining this key information
is not a matter of intuition. There is a method. Before journalists start to
write, they ask themselves a series of questions known as the 5Ws
& H.
1.
Who? Who are the person or persons involved in the story?
2.
What? What happened?
3.
When? When did it happen?
4.
Where? Where
did it happen?
5.
Why? Why did it happen?
6.
How? How did it happen?
Not all these questions will be
relevant all the time, but they provide a good test. After writing the lead,
check to see how many of the questions have been answered. If any answers are
missing, there are two possible reasons:
Ř
The question isn’t relevant, so
do nothing.
Ř
The question is relevant but
was neglected, so rewrite.
Another way to evaluate the lead
is the Stop
Remember, you are generally
writing for busy people. They generally
do not want—and often do not need—to read the entire text. So ask yourself:
At what point could someone stop reading and still get a clear, sharp picture
of what the text is all about? If they would need most or all of the text, you
must do some serious rewriting.
·
How to construct the body
The inverted pyramid is a pyramid because at each point from the lead
downward the information becomes less and less important. This does not mean
the information is necessarily less interesting; that is for each individual
reader to determine. However, it is no longer vital.
But how do you arrange information in descending order of importance?
Remember, it must be possible to delete information from the bottom without
anyone knowing that it was ever there.
This is certainly not easy; it requires a lot of skill and practice. But
once again, there is a method that offers considerable help. It is called the Q
& A Technique. It works like this.
After each sentence you write, examine it to see what
question
it could raise in the mind of your readers.
Then answer it!
If you do this consistently, you will find the answers becoming more and
more detailed, so the information will become less and less vital. When you run
out of questions, it is probably a good time to stop writing.
A Pertinent Example
Here is the lead of a story in an international newspaper.
Super-sportsman
Lance Armstrong, seven-time Tour de
France winner, filed suit Wednesday in a Paris court to force the publisher
La Martiničre to include his denial
of doping charges in a new book about him, scheduled to reach bookstores in
September.
(And the story continues)
Here are
the 5Ws & H.
1. Who? Lance Armstrong,
seven-time Tour of France winner
2. What? filed suit against the
publisher La Martiničre
3. When? Wednesday
4. Where? in a
5. Why? to
include his denial of doping charges in a new book
about
him
6. How? (not
relevant)
Note that the “Who” is not simply Lance Armstrong but “Lance Armstrong,
seven-time Tour of France winner”.
The name Lance Armstrong may not be immediately familiar to everyone, but with
this description, even people who have never heard of him would now know who he
is.
Similarly, the “What” is not simply that he filed a lawsuit but that he
filed suit against “the publisher La
Martiničre”. Most readers probably will not know who La Martiničre is, but they will know that the writer does, which
reinforces their confidence in the accuracy of the text. Gaining reader confidence
is essential to effective expository writing, and inserting precise detail
wherever relevant is an excellent way to do it.
Starting from this lead, the story continues down the inverted pyramid.
At each point, the information becomes less vital, giving each individual
reader the option to decide at which point they have had enough and can turn
their attention to something else.
How to Use the Inverted Pyramid in Your Type of Writing
You may now feel that the inverted
pyramid is an excellent idea—for newspapers. But is it relevant for the type of
writing that you do?
Emphatically, yes!
Remember, the inverted pyramid provides information in exactly the way
people prefer it, particularly when they are in a hurry.
Suppose you are writing some kind of
company report—a financial analysis, a new product proposal, changes to the
company's employment policies, etc. It runs to 20 pages. Obviously you can’t
organise it into one big inverted pyramid; even the most accomplished
professional writer wouldn’t attempt such a daunting task. However, you can
organise it into sections and subsections, and write these as inverted
pyramids.
You can even go a step further. Most
such reports begin with an executive summary. Write this as you would the lead
of an inverted pyramid, i.e. be certain that all the key information is located
there and that it is presented in a clear, concise, confidence-building manner.
Contrary to common
conventional wisdom, you
should write the executive summary before
you write the body, at least as a rough draft. To emphasise the point,
perhaps we should replace the term “executive summary”, which implies writing
the body first and then summarising it, for something more appropriate such as
“executive briefing”, “executive focus”, etc.
Treating the executive summary as
the lead of an inverted pyramid is not easy, but it confers some extraordinary
advantages on both the writer and the readers.
·
Advantages
for the writer
Identifying
and writing the executive summary first helps you to:
Ř
Determine what information you
really need in the body of the report, i.e. what is of key importance and
secondary importance. And what can be eliminated, i.e. what is of no
importance.
Ř
Organise the body into the most
appropriate sections and subsections.
Ř
Present the information in each
section and subsection in descending order of importance.
·
Advantages for the readers
With
an executive summary is written like the lead of an inverted pyramid, readers
can:
Ř
Get a clear overview of what the
report contains.
Ř
Determine which sections and
subsections of the body may be of particular interest.
Ř
Decide whether or not they even
need to read the body.
Remember, you are
dealing with busy people; they have neither the time nor the desire to read the
entire report. What they really want is for the writer to clearly identify what
they must read (executive summary). Any
additional material they may wish to read should be left to their own judgement.
The general structure of a well-written report would
thus consist of two parts:
1.
Executive
Summary
Written like the lead of an inverted pyramid, i.e.
build it on the 5 Ws & H
2.
Body
Written in sections and subsections, each one
in the form of an inverted pyramid
I recently had a discussion about the
ideas in this article with a journalist friend of mine, the president of a
major
company. He suddenly realised that over his 40-year career, the inverted
pyramid had become so much a part of him that he unconsciously uses it in
virtually everything he writes: letters,
emails, reports, financial statements, new product proposals, etc.
You will probably never reach the
stage of using the inverted pyramid without a second thought. However, if you
begin consciously using it as a first thought, I am certain you will be pleased
at just how much it will help you write more clearly, concisely—and rapidly.
Editor’s
Note
Philip Yaffe is a former
reporter/feature writer with The Wall
Street Journal and a marketing communication consultant. He currently
teaches a course in good writing and good public speaking in
This article is based on Mr. Yaffe’s excellent book In
the “I” of the Storm: the Simple Secrets of Writing & Speaking (Almost)
like a Professional. It is available directly from the publisher in
For further information, please contact:
Philip Yaffe
61, avenue des Noisetiers
B-1170 Brussels, Belgium
Tel: 32
2 660 0405
Email: phil.yaffe@yahoo.com
About the Author
Philip Yaffe is a former
writer with The Wall Street Journal and international marketing communication
consultant. He now teaches courses in persuasive communication in
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